Shhh, quiet: the introverted way to networking

Pretend to look for someone by pensively peering into the middle distance. Do a few laps to the bar and toilet. Busy yourself with your phone and visit the bar – again and again. Hang out with that friendly looking pot plant in the corner while you ask yourself what the hell are you doing there.

Sound familiar? For many of us – particularly introverts – attending large networking events can be at least intimidating. However, not many can refuse to attend after all. After being the one talking to the pot plant at several events, I’ve come to realize that networking can be enjoyable. But, only when you don’t force yourself to attend archetypal networking events and instead match them to your strengths and interests. Here're my 5 personal tricks to rock networking as an introvert.

1. Play to your strengths. Choose the best timing and event type for you. I still remember the days when I used to sign up to attend “evening drinks” networking events. Going into a bar with tons of strangers and loud music, after a long day at work, was demoralizing. Thank God for the drinks! I now stack the deck in my favor. I’m more of a morning person who enjoys the charm of little groups. I swore away from evening drinks and focused on breakfast events instead.
2. Boost your energy. As networking is energy consuming for us, ensure you walk into the room full of energy and a positive mindset. From meditating to eating a piece of cake; whatever boosts your energy best. Personally, I like to play my favorite songs on my way there. I always walk in with a smile.
3. Challenge yourself.  Make networking a numbers game. Set a target and stick to it. I tell myself: Sandra, once you meet 5 new people, you can leave. This gives me both purpose and encouragement. And most importantly, the chance to treat me after achieving my target :)
4. Be the listener. As introverts, we are good listeners and tend to be more interested in other people. Strengthen your talent and don’t force yourself. Prepare a few key questions to structure your conversations and let the extroverts do all the talking. You will be stress-free and learn much more.
5. Rate pros & cons. Every networking event should be subjected to a cost-benefit analysis: what can you get out of it? And what could you be doing, instead? I’m guilty of choosing friend gatherings vs. networking events. The cost of attending may be feeling exhausted for hours or days afterward. Be picky about how you spend your time and energy. Ask yourself, is your target audience likely to attend? This is however you define that, such as potential employers, clients, interesting colleagues, etc. Then follow up by asking, how likely it is that you’ll get to truly connect with them?

Finding the gatherings that work for you will transform your networking experience. You will be successful and make it more enjoyable. We shouldn’t torture ourselves in large networking events in the belief they will ultimately be good for us. Create your introverted way of doing extroverted things. Dare to be different!