Setting the Table, by Danny Meyer

Month 29: Setting the Table, by Danny Meyer

Danny Meyer’s Setting the Table: The Transforming Power of Hospitality in Business is more than a book about running a restaurant - it’s a masterclass in leadership, culture-building, and creating exceptional employee and customer experiences. Meyer, a renowned restaurateur, shares insights on how businesses can thrive by focusing on what he calls enlightened hospitality - prioritizing employees first, followed by customers, vendors, community, and investors. For people leaders, the principles in this book offer valuable strategies for fostering a positive workplace culture, driving employee engagement, and enhancing customer satisfaction. From this book I’ve gained invaluable insights that will shape me into a stronger HR leader, a more effective people manager, and a better person overall. I highly recommend this book to all employees in HR, customer relations, sales and anyone aiming to serve humanity.

Key Principles from Setting the Table

Enlightened Hospitality: Employees First

Meyer argues that businesses should put employees first, ahead of customers, vendors, and even investors. He believes that when employees feel valued and empowered, they will, in turn, create exceptional experiences for customers. A culture that prioritizes employee well-being ultimately drives business success.

• Valued and empowered employees naturally create better customer experiences.
• Organizations must foster an environment of respect, support, and recognition.
• Encouraging employee ownership and decision-making leads to better business outcomes.

Constant, Gentle Pressure (CGP)

To lead, Meyer lays out an amazing concept - constant, gentle pressure - a leadership approach that provides continuous feedback and improvement without overwhelming employees. Effective leadership requires a balance of these three elements: constant ensures consistency, gentle prevents burnout, and pressure drives excellence. Without all three, leadership becomes ineffective.

• Leaders should provide continuous feedback to maintain high standards.
• Two elements alone create inefficiency: e.g., constant pressure without gentleness creates stress; gentle pressure without consistency leads to stagnation, constant gentleness without pressure leads to low performance.
• Frequent, constructive feedback is more effective than infrequent performance reviews.

Hospitality vs. Service

Meyer makes a critical distinction between service and hospitality. Service is simply executing tasks efficiently, but hospitality is about making people feel valued. A company can provide great service without hospitality, but truly outstanding businesses go beyond transactions and build genuine relationships. Gem of a definition “Hospitality is when things happen for you instead of happening to you!”

• Service is the technical execution of tasks, while hospitality is about making people feel valued.
• Meeting expectations is service, but exceeding them with genuine care is hospitality.
• Employees should be trained to anticipate customer needs instead of merely reacting.
• Personalization and authentic connections create memorable experiences.

The 51% Rule: Hiring for Emotional Skills

Meyer believes the best employees are those who possess a higher percentage of emotional intelligence compared to technical skills. He advocates hiring based on attitude and personality, as technical skills can always be trained, but character and mindset determine long-term success.

• The best employees have 51% emotional intelligence and 49% technical skills.
• Soft skills like empathy, optimism, and adaptability are more important than technical expertise.
• Hiring should prioritize cultural fit and emotional intelligence over pure competence.
• Organizations should recognize and reward collaboration, positivity, and customer-centric thinking.
• You should hire a person only when your answer is a hell yes to the below three questions: The person whose opinion I respect the most and who is a strong judge of character, will that person select this candidate as one of good character? Will I feel perturbed if this person takes up a role in my fiercest competitor organisation? When your most important customer/stakeholder needs to be handled by this candidate, will your reaction be ‘Great!’ or ‘Oh no!’

Mistakes as Opportunities for Excellence

Meyer reframes mistakes as opportunities for growth rather than failures. He argues that when businesses handle mistakes transparently and proactively, they can strengthen relationships rather than damage them. A learning-focused culture ensures continuous improvement and fosters trust. Every mistake is a story that gives you a chance to write the last chapter differently (by making up for that mistake and creating delight)

• Mistakes, if handled well, can strengthen relationships instead of damaging them.
• Organizations should shift from a culture of blame to a culture of learning.
• Employees should be encouraged to take ownership of their mistakes.

Setting the Table provides a roadmap for leaders who want to build successful, people-cantered businesses. By prioritizing employees, fostering a culture of hospitality, and embracing continuous learning, organizations can enhance employee engagement, improve customer experiences, and drive long-term success. Meyer’s principles offer a compelling framework for building a thriving, high-performing organization that values people and relationships above all else.