R-E-S-P-E-C-T

October 17, 2022 

Dear Leaders, 

A cornerstone of leadership is respect. Leaders expect it, but it is to be earned. Giving it comes with the job, and that includes to everyone: seniors, colleagues, subordinates, support staff, customers, encounters, in short, everyone. Demanding it of others for yourself is perhaps situational, but demanding others show respect for your people is again, part of the job.  

Handling of disrespect to others requires respect and appropriacy, but also unequivocal resolve. After television talker Tucker Carlson spoke disparagingly about women in the military, United States Army Major General Patrick Donahoe sent a Twitter message in support of women serving and called the television host to task by name. The Army took a dim view of the general’s open debate with Mr. Carlson, and is reviewing it for possible disciplinary action, which will likely be nothing serious.  

While his specificity might have been a breach of decorum for a military officer, his intention certainly was not in calling out a television host who never served in the military and has neither understanding nor appreciation for the fact that women have long proven themselves capable of serving their country through military service and they are an invaluable part thereof. Support for Major General Donahoe within the ranks of the military far outweighs any dismay over his action.   

More troubling was the news of three members of the Los Angeles City Council meeting with a labor leader in which they plotted to redraw representation districts in their favor and to the detriment of their fellow councilmembers. In doing so, they insulted their other council colleagues and their families, their constituents, and others across the racial, ethnic, and religious spectrum with a litany of abusive language that would get me suspended from LinkedIn if I reprinted here. Their hypocrisy in a venomous conversation supporting their petty self-interest defied rationale, even for a governing body with a long history of corruption and malfeasance. Reaction demanding accountability has, at least for now, united these groups in their disdain and rejection of such disrespect.     

Respect is not at all hard, it simply requires leaders to treat everyone equally and the same. The world today is a mix of people who differ based on sex, race, ethnicity, beliefs, and preferences, and treating each of them as a human being, regardless of any of the aforementioned factors, or their station in life, is a simple thing to do. You don’t have to like them, you don’t have to agree with them, but you must regard them with the dignity due each and that which your credibility as a leader requires.  

While it might not be hard for you, the challenges of dealing with others who are not likewise so wise will not be easy.  Established mindsets, stereotypes, and intransigence are roadblocks to harmonious relationships and even to your own mission accomplishment. Leaders cannot tolerate even a hint or perception of discrimination or hostility toward someone else, and while we don’t want to fall into the trap of hypersensitivity that opportunists use to twist your efforts into something else, we need to take fast action to prevent a potential problem from becoming a major issue.     

One point is indisputable: failing to show respect for others, or tolerating those who don’t, will cost you every ounce of respect that people have for you. In days of yore, many in high places were able to get away with injurious behavior, and it still happens today. In the 21st century, however, it is impossible to escape scrutiny, and the fallout will be swift and severe. As of this writing, the labor leader and one Los Angeles City Councilmember resigned, and the others are facing a literal drumbeat of calls to step down. Their resistance is futile, as their ability to effectively perform their duties is gone.  

Balance comes from the way you treat everyone and the expectation that everyone else do the same. It doesn’t require blasts of trumpets before you to show how enlightened you and your organization are, and it doesn’t necessitate beating people over the head with a do it or else attitude. In setting the example, teaching your people well and realistically, and ensuring those you encounter at all levels live and work on a level playing field, you break the barriers that prevent not only your own workplace harmony, but those that hinder our advancement beyond our limitations.       

Sincerely,

Tim