Putting yourself on the line: An experience with television that has given me courage

Facing up.

When my partner managed to convince me to sit down in front of Skype one evening with faces from Indie Pictures production at the other end asking me deep and personal questions about us, I thought what am I getting myself into?!

Subsequently, what I thought was a chat at their office over the coming days ended up being a contract signing meeting where initial video footage was captured for a new television series for RTÉ2.

The show, Then Comes Marriage, is a relationship bootcamp with 3 couples per episode in the surrounds of a country house with guidance from Ireland's top relationship experts.

I knew it would be a fun but eye-opening and challenging experience with little control of the outcome where I thought to myself;

Would I be able for this?

What would people think of me when they see & hear me?

Would I be good enough?

The same thoughts that go through your mind when you try something completely new and outside your comfort zone - be it a 10km run, a holiday alone, an interview for a big job or a presentation in front of a large audience.

No going back now.

Here I am about to open up and talk about everything regarding myself, regarding us, for the experts but all in front of the cameras. The buzz of watching television or listening to live radio excites me but not when it is my personal life up for grabs.

For us, it would offer valuable insights into ourselves as individuals and as a couple before we take the next step in our relationship, while also sharing our experience with others in a similar place at home.

You feel a mix of emotions: overwhelmed, anxious and nervously excited before your big moment and the questions of doubt flood through you mind....again.

You've registered for the race, booked the holiday, secured an interview with the MD or sent your agenda for the large presentation. This it it for us too - we've begun talking and recording.

It's showtime.

Four months on, the show is scheduled to air and I think back to the recording. We spent hours with the relationship experts learning about me, about us. It became clear quite quickly that my main challenge was to accept myself and not worry about what everybody else thinks of me. I can only do my best and need to let my guard down to work on my confidence, to push myself forward.

With this guard I had held high, I prevented myself from trying new things and taking on new opportunities and hid most of my emotions from my partner and everybody else around me.

With the acceptance that you can't please everyone or do everything, comes confidence that enables you to strive to do YOUR best.

Whether it's getting to the finish line by walking, taking the holiday with a group of strangers for support, telling the interviewer you are great at so many things but you need to develop further in other areas, or doing that presentation with a colleague alongside you for support, that's ok.

That will give you courage to take the next step, do the next thing and achieve more.

That's a wrap.

With the experience of the TV show and valuable relationship insights firmly in the pocket came contributor opportunities where we both spoke about our journey on 2FM for listeners at home and hosted a Facebook Live broadcast on RTÉ2's Facebook page.

None of these were opportunities I would have grabbed in the past for fear of failure, worry of how I'd appear or sound, but this time I grabbed that mic faster than the 'recording in progress' light lit up and I went for it. The team all around us were the greatest advocates and support. We were buzzing, felt great and I had a huge weight off my shoulders.

Go for it in every area of your life.

Your partner, your family and your friends are there to support you all the way.

Don't doubt yourself - tie your laces for the start line, board that plane, take a seat at the interview table with a big smile and light up the room as you present.

Then Comes Marriage airs Monday evenings on RTÉ2 at 9.30pm until 20th February 2017 and is available to watch back on the RTÉ Player.

Peter Lynch: peterjlynch86@gmail.com