Problems & Finitude

Last night, I went to a talk by Oliver Burkeman, for the launch of his new book, Meditations for Mortals. It was a brilliant evening, and his ideas hit home. He made a point that stuck with me: we all have problems, and they never fully go away. Some people’s problems are a lot worse than others—he wasn’t dismissing that—but we tend to focus so much on “future me.” We tell ourselves that once we solve this problem, life will be better. But here’s the thing—there will always be something else. That whole idea of “future me” being stress-free? It’s a myth.

This got me thinking because, honestly, I do this all the time. The dopamine I get from thinking about solving a problem often outweighs the actual satisfaction of solving it. It’s the daydream: “When the mortgage is paid off”, or “When we release that feature”, or “When we clear that massive tech debt, everything will be better”. I’ve caught myself hanging too much of today’s happiness on that “when.” I convince myself that once I hit that milestone, it’ll all be sunshine and rainbows. But the truth? Reality is more like climbing one hill, only to find an even bigger one ahead.

Burkeman connected this to “finitude”—the fact that we’re all going to die someday, which makes time finite and precious. That’s where things started to sink in for me: why waste so much energy on problems that never really go away? He wasn’t saying we should stop caring or striving, but more about not putting off living or happiness until “future me” sorts everything out.

That’s where I struggle. If you’ve read my posts, you know I’m driven. I like the grind. I enjoy pushing myself, whether it’s in the gym, at work, or running that extra mile. My brain needs it. I feel whole when I’m working hard. But here’s the kicker—I often fall into the trap of thinking things will be better once I fix this or solve that. I overpromise to myself and others that life will be easier once I clear this hurdle, as if all my problems will magically disappear.

But the reality is, there’s always another challenge around the corner. I’m starting to realise it’s not about eliminating problems, it’s about embracing the climb itself. It’s about being present, finding satisfaction in the effort and progress, rather than waiting for some future moment of bliss that may never come. I’ll still work hard, push limits, and keep grinding, but I want to shift my mindset. Instead of waiting for happiness, I want to live it now, during the climb—not just at the peak.

Thanks to Oliver Burkman for a fantastic evening and for giving me so much to think about. Made even better by seeing it with friends, old and new. I’m excited to dive into Meditations for Mortals this weekend and see what other insights it has in store.