Knowing when to let go

☢️We have all been there or perhaps still are. In life, there are circumstances, events, issues over which we have no control. No matter how much soul seeking, anguish, sleepless nights we spend trying to identify a solution or “help” in a particular situation, our actions are futile.

Sometimes this can be difficult to accept. However, once we do accept the fact that certain things are external-dependent, then we can better invest our time doing things that merit our attention, whilst measuring what our potential scope of action can be.

⚖ e.g., a member of the team dislikes us, and no matter how hard we try, we cannot change their attitude towards us. In fact, our actions may even have a detrimental effect to the relationship, as the person could perceive that they possess some power over us (relating to our “need” to be liked) which may even reinforce their feelings of animosity. How could we react differently, by accepting the fact that we cannot be “loved” by everyone? That being respected is much more important, which allows us to distance ourselves and be more rational as opposed to emotional? Of course, this takes work and time, and the right tools to do so.

♻ Another example involves eco-anxiety. Of course, what is happening in the world is of a great deal of concern to us all, but what is our level of control over the situation? Sometimes we have to just let go, which doesn’t prevent us from initiating actions such as incorporating lifestyle changes, raising awareness, voting differently etc., i.e. initiating actions within our sphere of control.

⛔The same applies to friends and family who sometimes make life choices that we may disagree with. However, by trying to make them behave in the way we think they should behave, we often alienate them and increase their feelings of resentment, sometimes even reinforcing the “negative” behaviour. Our will to control in this case is totally counterproductive, and again, sometimes we just have to let things go.

❓What is causing you anguish? What is stopping you from sleeping? What is your potential sphere of action over the issues you are currently facing? Or do you just need to let go?