"Handle Hard Better"

This week marks the official start of spring. Our natural environment has been wintering for months—quietly surviving the darkest and coldest days of the year. We, as humans, have been wintering, too. But this week—this first wonderful week of spring—marks the start of an awakening.  

For many of us, this past winter felt particularly dark. One day into the next felt like a struggle as we wintered through these times as best as we could muster—and with help as we needed.

We coped with the death of loved ones, difficult diagnoses, tough times at work, and life changes that couldn’t have been expected.  

We’ve had good reasons to be wintering. And we’ve all wondered, “When will this get easier?”  

With the arrival of spring, it’s natural to expect that things will get easier. There’s a lightness arriving—in the form of longer and brighter days, trees blooming, and new life under our feet. Nature is waking up all around us.  

And we think: maybe things will get easier now.   

The truth is it won’t always get easier. As we winter on, we learn to handle hard better.  

That line, made famous by Duke women’s basketball Coach Kara Lawson in this must-watch motivational talk with her team, has become my mantra these days. The talk has been shared more than 1 million times since it was delivered to her players in 2022 and has served as a clarion call for people worldwide, reaching far beyond its intended audience.  

“We all wait in life for things to get easier. It will never get easier. What happens is you handle hard better…so make yourself a person that handles hard well.”  

We will always be disappointed if we wait for things to get easier. We will always feel behind where we want to be, trying to reach some magical place where others have figured out “easy.”  

Suppose we shift our thinking to understand that life won’t always get easier, but we can learn to handle hard better. Suppose we embrace the benefit of living through hard things and the benefit of continuously learning, growing, and progressing past difficult moments. How might perspective shift better prepare for the difficult moments ahead?  

The Stoic philosopher Seneca wrote, "No man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity. For he is not permitted to prove himself.” Getting through hard is required to reach our potential; getting through hard proves what we’re capable of. While we are not meant to do impossible things, we are meant to do hard things. And in time, we learn to do hard things better.  

And so I say to you—and me— as we enter this new season: Lean into what’s ahead. Grow through the hard moments. Embrace the adversity and the struggles thrown at you so you can be stronger, more prepared, and ready for what’s ahead. You are capable of great things, my friend. Don't let yourself forget it.

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