Emotional Intelligence coaching & Assertiveness Development (End-of-year's Gift Inside!)

Soft Skills psychometric test, Coaching journey and Development of Emotional Assertiveness.

"Assertiveness is the quality of being self-assured and confident without being aggressive to defend a right point of view or a relevant statement. In the field of psychology and psychotherapy, it is a skill that can be learned and a mode of communication."

"Assertiveness is the ability to express feelings, beliefs, and thoughts and defend one's rights in a non-destructive way. It involves effectively and constructively expressing one's emotions and oneself".

"Emotional intelligence (otherwise known as emotional quotient or EQ) is the ability to understand, use, and manage your own emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges and defuse conflict."

"Emotional assertiveness is the act of assertively expressing one's authentic emotions with the clear objective to strengthen and deepen friendship and cooperation. As such it is an essential building block of healthy families, teams, and organisations."

How Emotional Intelligence coaching boosts and enhances the level of Informed Assertiveness? What are Your Inner strengths, How do You use them? Do You assess, regulate and communicate Your emotions? How soft-skilled are You? From where are we starting the journey, what are Your levels of inner competencies? Where are we heading, which one is beneficial to improve from Your perspective?

EI coaching approach focused on 'Assertiveness development' could be divided into three big chunks. The first is the Assessment phase, in poor words we need to understand where we are and where we want to go, how to get there, and crucially importantly what obstacles could we find on the way there, physical obstacles, emotional obstacles, or lacunas (it is a journey, precisely!). The assessment part starts with EI psychometric tests and a deep understanding of the person's habits, dreams, goals, and of course, annoyances too. The coach and coachee analyse together what behaviour generates what emotions and why. Dwelling on the cognitive behavioural spectrum the candidate is empowered with self-awareness, s/he can assess what emotions arise when a specific event manifest. This leads to the second big chunk. Once emotions are assessed and the inner dialogue is kind, negotiating, and constructive, we can move to Regulation, Acceptance, and Commitment. This is the phase where the coach and the coachee rationalise the pros and cons of different behavioural experiments. Important to mention: Emotional Mastery is a never-ending process, the goal of the coaching journey is to empower the client with a new way of thinking and processing events working on the cognitive, emotional, and behavioural facets. Once the client gained awareness of behaviours, s/he determines which ones are beneficial and which ones are detrimental, which ones need development, which one has priority and so on. When the intentions are clear, the client starts experimenting with new behaviours, new interventions, and likely new routines (personal and professional). During this second phase, the goal of both the coach and the coachee is to regulate those uprising unpleasant emotions and turn them into positive ones. The client must commit to experimenting and taking gradual risks, also embracing mistakes as the normal route to self-growth. The third and final phase is the one in which the client focuses on developing the capability to Communicate Emotions in a constructive, positive way. During the first two phases, the candidate already gained awareness of behaviours and emotions, gained the ability to regulate those uprising ones, and commit to alternative behaviours to generate alternative outcomes. The third phase is where we specifically reconnect with Assertiveness, and Emotional Assertiveness more specifically. Here the coach and the coachee's goals are to create a communicative way that combines the comprehension of the candidate's emotions, in relation to other people's emotions, and vice versa. The communication will aim to not harm anyone's emotions, and the solutions proposed too will take into consideration the physical, professional, and emotional consequences of that choice. The candidate here gains the Equilibrium between the passive and aggressive. Ultimately, s/he generates the capability of self-listening and by combining such skill with the communicative way developed in the third phase, Assertiveness (personal and professional) becomes the consequent outcome.

The duration of the development process cannot be guaranteed by the coach, instead, it can be determined by the candidate's willingness, determination, and willpower. The very least duration for the journey is four months, the average is eight. More extensively, for a sustainable metabolization of the new brain activities, and settling of a new mental frame for processing events, the suggested duration is twelve months. During this time, both the coach and the coachee have the time for experimenting, analysing and processing the daily life scenario, and most importantly they will both have the time for creating a new frame of perspectives and approaches that will be maintainable and sustainable for the time to come.

My personal and professional purpose is to bring calmness, awareness, and ultimately emotional mastery. I do so through professional coaching, philosophy lessons and spiritual guidance. Of course, I won't the finances to be an obstacle to any human being longing for self-knowing (this is a tenet of the school of practical philosophy too). I do comprehend it might not be affordable for anyone having a 12-months basis coach and this is the reason why I opted to provide a One-Off ECR Assessment Session. It is way more affordable than hiring a coach on an annual basis, it still empowers the candidate with a numeric and graphic report of soft skills, and it includes a two-hours session where the coach delivers the graphic and the interpretation.

Something more about the EI psychometric assessment test: The journey of soft-skill discovery and development with a certified EI coach starts with at least one or two Emotional Intelligence psychometric tests. The most elaborated one recently invented and patented by RocheMartin is founded on the endless work of Daniel Goleman and Reuven Bar-On before him. Their efforts, studies, and discoveries have been critically crucial for Martin Newman and Judy Purse to build the most reliable EI soft-skills Assessment Test so far (at the moment of writing). The ECR (Emotional Capital Report) can empower both the coach and the coachee with an extensive report focused on the client's emotional intelligence competencies. The EI-trained coach will then be able to elaborate, rationalise, and ultimately provide an extensive and explicative delivery of the test results. In fact, thanks to the training, the coach can support the candidate to spot what combined inner competencies generate certain emotional feelings and consequent behaviours. The client is encouraged to notice, graphically and numerically, her/his soft skills, furthermore, it will be the candidate (the very expert of her/his life) to determine which competencies deserve development based on what results are on target. The role of the coach, once again, is to facilitate the process by bringing suitable and appropriate mental tools, allowing access to a new field of creativity, understanding, and problem-solving.

The test under the lens (Emotional Capital Report ECR) targets on three main focuses divided into ten competencies: Inner, Outer, and Other. Inner Focus: Self-Knowing, Self-Confidence, Self-Reliance, and Self-Actualisation. Outer Focus: Adaptability, Optimism, Self-Actualisation. Other Focus: Empathy, Relationship Skills, Straightforwardness. The candidate is asked to undertake the ninety-questions test on the provider's platform (the coach will provide a guideline on how to access and login). For the most reliable result, the candidate could consider answering the test with a calm and serene frame of mind, with no hurry nor any task to attend soon after. The answers have to be transparent, honest, and genuine. They must be focused on the current situation, not on the aimed future situation. The test, moreover, generates a "positive impact" factor, so if the candidate provides responses misaligned with each other or s/he tries to impress or literally attempts to sound positive, the Positive Impact score can help the coach to notice it. The positive impact score, in fact, ranges from 70 to 130, if the score is above 120 or below 80 the coach might need the candidate to undertake the test once again encouraging being highly honest and transparent.

Shortly after completion of the test, the coach will receive the graphic results and has to analyse and understand the graphic in order to ultimately provide a rich and extensive feedback report, professionally delivered thanks to the training received. The soft skills are presented numerically as well as graphically and discussed together with a curious and self-exploring approach. This is the first assessment phase, in fact, we explore the test's results and we rationalise their meaning in real-life's thoughts and actions, with particular attention on the emotional-behavioural action-reaction dynamic. This is the phase in which we browse the candidate's soft skills and competencies and we extend the comprehension into Why these specific dynamics are generated and eventually how to defuse the unpleasant ones. The client determines which one needs development, which one has a priority, and what real-life experiment can implement to nurture one or another competence. The coach and the coaching journey aim to be 'alert, attentive, and present'. With being present the coach and the coachee are able to understand where it could be better to channel the interventions and tools proposed. The coaching relationship might stretch into neuroscience, into meditation, into philosophy, into maybe more business-focused topics. Step by step, session after session, the coach and the coachee determine where and when to direct the interventions and practices, depending on the duration and frequency agreed upon.

Once again, to emphasise the linkage between emotional intelligence coaching and assertiveness: "Emotional assertiveness is the act of assertively expressing one's authentic emotions with the clear objective to strengthen and deepen friendship and cooperation. As such it is an essential building block of healthy families, teams, and organisations." 

Thanks for the time You invested in reading.

I am currently gifting 11 sessions to 11 strangers before the end of '22. It aims to be my gift to the Universe for the multitude of blessings and lessons he gifted in order to serve other humans. If personal, professional, and/or spiritual development stimulates Your curiosity and You feel intrigued, please do get in touch, You will find a friendly-professional human being willing to support and facilitate Your journey. I am committed to human flourishing, this gift wants to be a genuine gift, with no expectations. Hope You will take advantage!

Best of blessings.

Nick Atzeni