Ditch Networking, Embrace Connection

Does the word "networking" make you cringe? Do you envision awkward small talk and the frantic exchange of business cards? You're not alone. What if I told you that true connection – the kind that nourishes your soul and boosts your well-being – is the antidote to this superficial approach? It’s not about collecting contacts; it’s about cultivating meaningful relationships, and science proves it’s vital for your health, happiness, and professional success.

The Hidden Health Benefits of Connection

We often think of professional connections in terms of career advancement, but the benefits extend far beyond the boardroom. In his book The Laws of Connection, David Robson illuminates the profound impact of social connection on our physical and mental health. 

Research shows that strong social bonds can significantly reduce the risk of serious illnesses like heart disease, strokes, and even Alzheimer's. For context, a lack of social connections can be on the same level of cardiovascular risk factors as smoking cigarettes and drinking too much alcohol, and may be an even higher risk than obesity, lack of physical activity, and high blood pressure. (Whoa!) When we feel connected, our bodies release hormones that lower stress and boost our immune system. This isn't just about a nice chat; it's about living longer and healthier – and when you do this right, it can also be great for business.

Creativity, Happiness, and the Power of Unity

Beyond physical health, genuine connection fuels creativity and happiness. When we feel seen and understood, we're more likely to take risks, share ideas, and collaborate effectively. Robson's work emphasizes the importance of "we," the feeling of belonging to a community, which is very similar to Dr. Robert Cialdini 's Unity principle (yes, I did refresh that episode this week in honor of David’s episode).

Unity highlights the power of shared identity. To build genuine connections, you should seek out individuals who share your values, interests, and goals. This sense of shared identity creates a strong foundation for trust and collaboration. Whether it's a shared hobby, a professional interest, or a common cause, finding your "tribe" is crucial for fostering meaningful relationships.

This sense of belonging fosters a supportive environment where innovation thrives. It’s a space where people feel safe to share ideas, and where collaboration blossoms.

Using Connection to Transform the Workplace

Thankfully, the benefits of genuine connection extend beyond personal contacts and are fantastic for work. When employees feel connected to their colleagues, they're more engaged, productive, and satisfied. Building a culture of connection can transform the workplace into a supportive and collaborative environment where everyone thrives.

How To Increase Connection

So, how do we move beyond superficial interactions and cultivate genuine connections? David stresses the importance of vulnerability and authenticity. Sharing your authentic self, including your fears and insecurities, can create a powerful bond. This doesn't mean oversharing or being inappropriate, but rather being honest and open about your experiences. (Check out my episode on vulnerability loops.)

The Power of Active Listening

One way to build connections with others is by being a better and more active listener. You’ve likely heard it before, but it is cliche for a reason (we can all be better listeners, I promise). Active listening involves truly focusing on what the other person is saying, rather than just waiting for your turn to speak. Some key aspects of active listening include:

• Pay full attention: Put away distractions and focus on the speaker.
• Ask clarifying questions: Show that you're engaged and seeking to understand.
• Reflect what you've heard: Summarize the speaker's points to ensure you've understood correctly.
• Empathize with their feelings: Acknowledge and validate their emotions.

This is simple in theory, but the application takes focused dedication. And it is so worth it.

The Liking Gap

While you may feel hesitant to reach out to people (“I don’t want to bug them! Why would they want to talk to me, anyway?”) there is some very good news found in a fascinating phenomenon called the "liking gap." 

Studies show that people consistently underestimate how much others like them. This means that those authentic, vulnerable conversations you're hesitant to have are likely to be received far more positively than you anticipate. 

Your lesson: assume people like you even if your brain is telling you they couldn’t care less because the chances are that they like you more than you realize. 

Brainy Thought of the Week

Instead of focusing on networking, commit to building genuine connections. Take the time to listen, be vulnerable, and seek out your "tribe." You'll be amazed at the positive impact it has on your health, happiness, and career. 

What is 1 thing you will do today to cultivate deeper connections? 

It could be a person you reach out to, someone you choose to be vulnerable with, or listening more actively in one conversation - just make sure you connect with your intention.

BE thoughtful,

Melina