Decisions, Decisions

I originally wrote this post last year, after spending a week deliberating nonstop over an important decision where I had to choose one out of several great options.  Yes, it was a good problem to have.  And yes, it was still physically, mentally and emotionally draining.   

Over the decision-making period, I kept coming back to a tool that I learned in my coach training, and often use with my clients.  The concept of holographic thinking describes three different resources we use when making decisions: logic, emotions and intuition.  The following metaphor came to me as I sat with this tool.  

Think of a tree.  Your logical mind is like the trunk, it’s the most obvious part of the tree, unchanging, in-your-face, and hard to argue with.  Your emotions are like the leaves - they add beauty, detail and uniqueness, but they are also fleeting.  They change over time and become less relevant.  Your intuition is like the roots. They ground the tree and hold it up, yet you often forget they are there - you have to dig deep to find them. 

When I leaned more heavily into logic, I got caught in loops - there was no clear rational choice because each one was objectively better than the other on some known, observable, important metric. And when it came to unknowns, logic fell short.  When I tuned in to my emotions, I noticed regret and anxiety alongside excitement and curiosity.  Every time I shifted my focus from one choice to the other, my emotions swayed too, leading to even more confusion.  As I realized that neither my logical nor emotional resources were truly serving me, I tried to look past the noise and connect with my intuition.   A whole lot of deep breathing helped me get there.  

Making a truly tough decision means accepting that we don’t know factually if it’s the right one.  It means going against what someone else might do.  It means experiencing and accepting the self-doubt that inevitably creeps up.  It means believing there is a purpose to everything, even when it doesn't meet our expectations.  

It means knowing less and trusting more.  

Warm Regards,

Divya